Folks, big news out of the land of the rising sun! Zack Sabre Jr., that sharp-tongued, even sharper-elbowed Brit, has clinched the 34th G1 Climax, making history as only the second foreigner to pull off this feat since 1991. Yes, it’s true! The last time this happened, Pokémon was just starting to wreak havoc on everyone’s Game Boys, and now, here we are!
Zack, who’s as flexible as the political promises in a debate, made short work of Yota Tsuji in the finals, tying him up in knots so tight you’d think he was knitting a Union Jack scarf. And listen, folks, this wasn’t just any win. Oh no. Zack’s been on a mission all year, telling anyone with ears that his career would be as pointless as a Brexit deal if he didn’t snag that trophy. And snag it, he did. But here’s where things get interesting.
You see, Zack’s not one for following the script. After securing that sweet golden flame trophy, he decided to toss tradition out the window like it was last season’s Premier League standings. Instead of waiting until Wrestle Kingdom in January to challenge for the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship—because who likes waiting, right?—he’s setting his sights on Tetsuya Naito at King of Pro Wrestling on October 14. And why, you ask? Because Zack loves Ryogoku Sumo Hall, and who could blame him? It’s got more history than the Magna Carta.
But wait, there’s more! Sabre’s got a plan to bring the IWGP World Heavyweight Title back to his beloved Blighty at NJPW Royal Quest 4 on October 20. That’s right, folks, the man’s so patriotic he wants to give England the world title faster than you can say “fish and chips.”
For those keeping score, the only other foreigner to win this tournament was Kenny Omega in 2016. And before that, way back when MTV actually played music videos, foreign legends like Andre the Giant and Hulk Hogan took home the gold in predecessor tournaments. But let’s not get bogged down in history—Zack’s too busy rewriting it.