In a dazzling display of chaos, ladders, and what can only be described as a wrestling fever dream, AEW All In 2024 kicked off with a “London Ladders” match that left fans breathless and Christian Cage with yet another reason to question his life choices. PAC, ever the gravity-defying daredevil, cemented his allegiance with the Blackpool Combat Club (BCC) by soaring to the top—both literally and figuratively—to secure the AEW World Trios Championship for his team.

From the get-go, the ring was a frenzy of high-flying antics, bone-crunching collisions, and the type of carnage you’d expect from a match where ladders are the weapon of choice. Christian Cage, the self-proclaimed “Father of the Year” who apparently forgot how ladders work, spent the opening minutes playing hide-and-seek backstage. When he finally showed his face, it wasn’t to save his team but to take advantage of the chaos by trying to sneak up the ladder. Classic Cage. But like a raccoon caught in the headlights, his scheme fell apart faster than his chances of winning a “Dad of the Year” award.

Just when it looked like Killswitch might salvage a win, Cage reappeared—demanding, of course, that he be the one to claim the titles. Predictably, this last-minute bout of narcissism backfired, giving PAC the perfect opportunity to ascend the ladder and claim victory for the BCC, while Cage got booted back to reality.

The aftermath promises more drama than a soap opera marathon. With Cage’s ego bruised and his teammates’ patience worn thin, it’s only a matter of time before the Patriarchy crumbles under the weight of its own dysfunction. Meanwhile, PAC’s future with the Blackpool Combat Club is looking brighter than a superkick at sunrise, especially now that his former Death Triangle pals, Penta El Zero Miedo and Rey Fenix, are eyeing greener pastures in WWE.

Stay tuned, folks—because this story is far from over, and Christian Cage’s misery is just getting started.

By Joseph Gallery

I like ice cream, taking a back seat, wondering who I am, and pretending kayfabe is real. May or may not be the Real Dark Brandon. For the LOLZ. MALARKEY!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *